TVG: How involved are you in your own care?
MJF: [Im involved] to the extent I know what the drugs are and what they do. And Ive also had [brain surgery] that helped me tremendously. But anybody who has Parkinsons is only the expert on their Parkinsons. Because its a very idiosyncratic, anomalous condition.
TVG: So youre not intimidated by that. You want to know it all?
MJF: Oh, absolutely. The reason I have a sunny disposition is that Im equal parts optimistic and realistic.
TVG: How did you tell your children about this?
MJF: Thered be little tiny things, like theyll say, "Can you read a story?" And if Im between doses of medication, theres a transition period where its sometimes difficult to have some dexterity. And Ill say, "Yeah, I can read to you. Youve got to hold the book." And theyll say, "Why?" And Ill say, "Because Ill have a hard time holding it right now." And thats about all you can do with my 5-year-olds. With my son, who has always been scientifically oriented, he has a book that big brain book. And I take the thing out and go, "This makes this stop, and it doesnt make it [stop] for me." When I had my surgery, I talked to him about it. [I] could be very matter-of-fact.
TVG: Was he worried?
MJF: No, he hasnt said so. But a little while ago I was having a conversation with him, and my right hand was tremoring a bit, and he was listening to me. And he was right in my eyes. He didnt break. He just put his hand on my hand and kept listening to me. And it was this great moment. I finished the conversation and walked away. I said [to Tracy], "I had no idea that anyone could be that empathetic." He was just kind of saying, "You know, its fine. Dont be distracted by that because it has nothing to do with us." In a way Im grateful for [having the disease]. Because there wasnt this balance. When youre 29 years old, which is the age I was when I was diagnosed, and youve had a winning streak like I had [it feels] right that I would get a bag of hammers. Not to get too mawkish about it, but I didnt become a man until I had this. And it has given me kind of a serenity and a clarity that I wouldnt have had otherwise. But all said and done, Im not going to run out of money. Theres steaks in the fridge and life is good.